Double Whammy--Empty Nest & Military Mom

What does one do when they have been up since 3:30 a.m.?  Knowing I wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep, I cleaned the kitchen, folded laundry and picked up the house.  I guess I might as well be productive as I think about what is ahead.

 It is the day I have to leave my son at a hotel.  Thankfully it isn’t too far from where we live but it is that initial step into what I believe is a double whammy.  I will be learning to adjust to this new season where my firstborn child has left the nest.  But I will also be dealing with the emotional rollercoaster of being a military mom.

Despite the many years of taking care of three children, I will no longer be responsible for one.  Although it should feel like my parenting load has been lightened, there is still a sense of sadness over it.

I can’t help but think about how in a few weeks, I won’t have to wake him up for school. 

I won’t have to ask if he finished his homework, has clean clothes to wear or what his plans for the weekend are. 

Although I will always be the mom of three children, I am now responsible for just two.

So the fact that he will no longer be living in our home is difficult enough.  But adding to that, there is the uncertain future of his career in the military.

There is having to deal with the next eight weeks, with no control over my contact with him.  I won’t be there to rescue him from the training instructors who are screaming in his face. 

I won’t be able to comfort him in his darkest hour.  I won’t be able to give him a hug or kiss on the head.

But I will always have my phone by my side, praying for that phone call to come through.  Or I will be checking my mailbox each day, hoping to see a letter. 

There will be the countdown until I can see him again after he graduates.  But then knowing it will be another goodbye as he starts technical school and then the unknown of where he will end up—possibly stateside or overseas.

No matter what the circumstances are when our kids leave home, they end up maturing and changing.  But his pace will be much quicker.  He will be remade by the United
States Air Force.

The young man I say goodbye to at the airport tomorrow will not be the same one I see again in eight weeks.  He will be an Airman.

Yes, it is a double whammy for this mom.  My firstborn child is not only leaving the nest but he is about to embark on a journey that will require bravery unlike anything most of us could imagine.

Photo above by Kilarin in Flickr